This post finds me at work (8:10pm) knowing I will be here for at least another 10.5 hours. As I listen to an old band called the Jayhawks, I've been getting a bit nostalgic. Looks like I may have a little time to share what's been going on in my life the last few months.
First, an old friend, Jeff Niblack, introduced me to the Jayhawks while I was a co-op engineering student doing a stint at Protein Technologies. "Protein!" you say? That plant smelled so good the women complained that they gained weight just by working there. Oh, r-i-i-i-i-ght. Anyway, the plant was in Pryor, Oklahoma, and I suppose that it's a bit ironic that I would be listening to the Jayhawks while typing on the blog. I'll use that as a segue into the next paragraph.
I put my notice in last week with SRP--I'm trying to give them a couple of months though I fear that still won't be enough--and the reality of leaving is beginning to seep in. For over nine years, I have been in the same office, at the same desk, dealing primarily with the same people every day. I am leaving on really great terms, but it's really hard nonetheless. Because we're such a small research group, my absence will be magnified beyond typical departures. I've got a great relationship with my bosses--I work out with one--and you never know what you're going to get when you venture into the great unknown. Also, I've got a really unique, cool job. I'm trading all of it for financial gain and (hopefully) a better place to raise a family. A larger family...
We're about 2.5 months pregnant with our second child. I haven't even had time to process that yet. E has been uber sick (in the hospital for dehydration) and the photography business has been unrelenting. Between taking care of her, trying to take care of Lolo, and taking Meshach to Arkansas, I've been trying to prepare the house to sell. As I was walking to the control room this evening, I realized that if I didn't look like me, I wouldn't recognize myself. I have changed so much in the last 9 years...I feel like an old man. Not good.
In many ways, even though I believe it for the greater good, the change makes me melancholy. The music is fitting, though.
3 comments:
Hey, brother. Your words really hit me, "If I didn't look like me, I wouldn't recognize myself." Those are the words I was trying to think of last night! Even in just the last year or so, life has changed so much that sometimes I forget it's ME walking through it. In just the last couple weeks, I feel like I've become quite a different person.
Change is striking. It's exhilarating and overwhelmingly scary all at once.
(pause for ten minutes, drifting off to space and considering a positive ending to this short note...)
Oh well, I've got nothing tonight. Thanks for your words, though.
See you on the other side...
I'm not sure if you will see this, or how often you check your blog but I was thinking about you today and googled your name and found you.
Your little girl is absolutely beautiful, and congratulations on your new baby also.
Love your cousin,
Teresa
thanks for looking...and caring, y'all.
love
c
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